Why So Many of Us Feel Disconnected — and What Actually Helps

Loneliness is having a moment, but not in the fun, trendy way.

A lot of people are quietly struggling with it, even if their lives look full on the outside. We’re more “connected” than ever, but for many of us, that connection lives mostly on screens — and it isn’t always translating into real closeness, real conversation, or real support.

In case you didn’t already know, you are not alone in feeling alone. The U.S. Surgeon General called loneliness and isolation a public health crisis in its 2023 advisory, and the World Health Organization has also highlighted social connection as a major health issue, not just an emotional one. This is not a small, personal problem. It’s a growing cultural one. 

Why Loneliness Feels Worse Now

There isn’t one reason. It’s a bunch of things stacking up at once. Social media and smartphones are a big part of the story. A 2025 Baylor study found that both passive scrolling and active posting were linked to increased loneliness over time, and the researchers pointed to a feedback loop: lonely people reach for social media, but the use itself can end up deepening the loneliness. That’s the part that’s so frustrating — the thing we use to feel less alone can sometimes make us feel more alone.

Then there’s the simple fact that our social habits have changed. More time is spent indoors, online, or in isolated routines. Fewer casual face-to-face moments happen naturally. The old “stop by, say hi, linger for a while” rhythm of life has been replaced by calendars, feeds, and quick replies.

Alcohol culture is changing too. According to Gallup, the percentage of U.S. adults who say they drink alcohol fell to 54% in 2025, the lowest level in nearly 90 years of tracking. That shift may be good for public health overall, but it also means people are losing one of the default social lubricants that used to make gatherings feel looser and easier.

None of this means alcohol was the answer. It wasn’t. But it does help explain why some people feel socially rusty right now. If you take away the easy icebreaker, and then add in phone dependence, busier schedules, and less in-person time, it makes sense that a lot of people feel stuck on the outside looking in.

The Health Impact is Real

This isn’t just about feeling a little blue. The Surgeon General’s advisory says social isolation and loneliness are associated with major health risks, including cardiovascular disease, dementia, depression, and premature mortality. 

WHO’s work on social connection makes a similar point: connection is tied to better health and longer life, while disconnection is a real risk factor. That’s why this conversation matters. Loneliness doesn’t stay neatly in one lane. It can affect sleep, mood, motivation, stress, and the way people move through their days. Over time, it can become the backdrop to a lot of other problems.

The Drop in Alcohol Consumption and Rise of THC

The good news is that people are not just sitting with the problem. They’re experimenting with new ways to socialize that feel more intentional and less forced.

One big shift is the rise of sober-curious and low-alcohol socializing. People still want the fun of a night out, but not necessarily the hangover, the anxiety, or the next-day crash. That has opened the door for THC-infused drinks, tinctures, and other cannabis-based social alternatives that can fit into a more relaxed, modern ritual.

There’s also a growing appetite for “sober-ish” gatherings — parties where the vibe is still social, but alcohol isn’t the centerpiece. Think better conversation, lighter drinks, smaller groups, more activities, and a lot less pressure.

In a recent interview on the podcast Matt & Shane’s Secret Podcast, actor Joel McHale talks about his young adult sons teasing him for drinking wine and he went on to say “I’ve got friends now who have their own drinks when they come over and it’s THC.” This move is becoming more popular not just with the younger generation but the 40-plus year olds looking for ways to stay social without the damaging effects (and hangover!) of alcohol use.

And on the tech side, more people are starting to realize they need actual boundaries with their phones. Not because phones are evil, but because endless scrolling is not the same thing as feeling known.

Quick Ways to Break Free From Loneliness

There’s no one magical fix. But there are some real moves that can help.

Start smaller than you think

If you’ve been isolated for a while, don’t try to go from zero to “super social person” overnight.

Text one friend. Say yes to one invite. Invite one person for coffee, a walk, or a low-key hang. Loneliness often shrinks when socializing stops feeling like a performance and starts feeling like something simple again.

Make the phone less central

Try one phone-free meal a day. Put your phone in another room for the first hour after work. Leave it in your bag during dinner.

These aren’t dramatic changes, but they matter because they create space for actual interaction. A lot of loneliness isn’t caused by being literally alone — it’s caused by being mentally elsewhere while other people are around.

Build social rituals, not just plans

Connection gets easier when it has a rhythm.

That might mean a weekly dinner with friends, a Saturday morning walk, a monthly game night, or a recurring “come over and make something easy” gathering. Repeated rituals reduce the awkwardness of starting over every time.

Choose activity-based meetups

If direct conversation feels intimidating, give it a shared focus.

Group hikes, fitness classes, cooking nights, trivia, volunteering, rec leagues, and creative workshops all create connection without making the entire event about “let’s all be social now.” That pressure release matters.

Rethink the social drink

As we mentioned, for some people, a THC-infused drink or tincture can be part of a more intentional evening — something that helps signal “we’re relaxing now” without defaulting to alcohol.

A THC-infused tincture can be used for a low-key gathering, a pre-party wind-down, or a “sober-ish” night in which the goal is presence, not excess. Just one way, if alcohol has been an ever-present part of your social life, you can make a small lifestyle change that is part of a calmer, more mindful social ritual.

Make it easier to say yes

A lot of loneliness comes from friction. People don’t always need a deeper reason to connect — they just need it to feel easy.

That means keeping plans simple:

• “Want to grab coffee for 30 minutes?”
• “Want to take a walk?”
• “Want to come over and hang out for a bit?”
• “Want to do a phone-free dinner?”

The lower the pressure, the higher the chance people actually show up. It also helps that fear of rejection dissipate because a “no” to a low stakes request is really no big deal. “Perhaps another time.”

A Better Version of Social Life

The point isn’t to go backward. It’s not about pretending social media doesn’t exist or acting like alcohol is the basis of social interaction. It isn’t. But we are living through a real shift, and a lot of people are trying to rebuild social life in a way that feels healthier, more grounded, and more human.

That’s why this conversation feels so timely. People are craving presence. They want to feel less isolated, less performative, and less stuck in their heads. And whether that starts with a phone basket, a better hangout plan, or a THC-infused drink shared with friends, the goal is the same: more real connection, less quiet disconnection.

What have you tried to help battle loneliness? Let us know, because well, you’re not alone. We just convince ourselves we are.